You cannot go to far these days whether driving down the highway you can listen to Dr. Laura who dispenses with marital advice. You could open the New York Times and get advice on marriage from Erma Bombeck. The choices are virtually endless. But if all the advice coming from experts were correct, why is it that about half of all marriages in America end in divorce? What is the real problem?
You see, there are so many choices of marital advice that you can easily become confused. So how could someone tell the difference between good counsel and downright dangerous advice?
The Myth of The Expert
One myth perpetuated today, is that you need to have an advanced degree or be a licensed family therapist or even have a PhD in psychology in order to give good advice. If those myths were true, then why do we have so many men and women hurting in relationships that no longer work?
It is true that you do not need to be a licensed hypnotherapist in or to dispense with meaningful advice. What is really odd is that in early 1900's people ordinarily did not get divorced. Marital problems were handled by clergy, ministers, maybe the family doctor, town Mayor or in the family.
Who Are Your Listening To?
There is danger in just accepting anyone's marriage advice, or turning to friends and family when your marriage is in trouble. For one thing, your friends and family may have a tendency to take your side on things, or may not realize when you're just telling your side of the story without being honest as to how your own behavior is contributing to the problem. Also, getting marriage advice means revealing some of the problems you're having in your marriage, and your spouse may not like you airing your dirty laundry to these people or talking to your parents or your best friend about his or her personal business.
Sound Advice is RARE
In cases such as these, it might be good to speak to an actual counselor for marriage advice. There is usually something much safer about talking to a third-party stranger that doesn't know you when discussing personal business. Also, he or she may be able to recognize difficult problems that your friends may not be experienced with. While your friend may be able to listen to your problems, he or she may not be able to offer sound marriage advice for how to effectively deal with these problems. Many people need someone to just talk to or to vent their frustrations to occasionally, but to really address your problems and get marriage advice on how to make them go away, you may need to call in the professionals.
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